Fear can be your best friend and provide you with insight of an expensive therapist. Next time you feel a paralyzing fear, stop, and take some time to assess what caused it; was it your boyfriend suggesting a weekend getaway? Was it racing in your first 10k? Whatever the trigger is, recognize it and do some soul searching of ways you could be more secure in the situation…. For the 10k fear, maybe you tell yourself that instead of ‘racing’ you’re just going for a ‘fun run’ and maybe don’t tell too many people so you don’t feel as much pressure. For the weekend getaway, you could be afraid of getting committed. Pause, ask yourself if you love the person who asked you, or, if you love spending time with them and you’re still figuring out the long term. Either way, be transparent but don’t not go just because there are lots of elements of the trip that will be unpredictable.
Also, in all of the situations, realize what self-talk helped you dismiss the fear… For example, was it telling your friends not to attend your race? If so, recognize that you really feel the pressure to please others. If you felt less afraid of the weekend getaway after you told yourself that it wasn’t doomed or that everything would be out of your control, recognize that control and optimize is something for you to work on. Remember, we are all works in progress.
Embrace the fear.
What is giving you fear this weekend? How have you dealt with it?
Discover your Spidey Sense!